The Priestly text states "Be fruitful and multiply."[1]  Consequently, many religious individuals believe that procreation is a God-sponsored sporting event, albeit not for spectators.  According to Protevangelion, the grandparents of Jesus Christ felt shame because they could not have children,[2] and worse, Jesus Christ's grandmother was ostracized because her womb was barren.[3]  But her shame was alleviated by the miraculous birth of her daughter Mary.[4]  Although not in the Bible, Protevangelion probably contains genuine facts not mentioned elsewhere.  For example, the early testimony of Justin Martyr agrees with Protevangelion that Jesus was born in a cave, over and against Luke which says he was born in a manger.[5]

     Jesus did not agree with the mistreatment of the barren, and he blatantly disregarded the Priestly text's command to reproduce sexually.  Jesus said,

 

Some have cut off their genitals on behalf of the Kingdom of Heaven.  Not everyone can accept this doctrine, but those who can accept this, let them accept it.[6]

 

Spoken as hyperbole, which Jesus frequently employed, the meaning of the overstatement is still apparent.  On this point, the teaching of Jesus is again at odds with the Priestly text, and therefore he is also at odds with Genesis 1, because it is part of the Priestly text.  Yet Jesus' doctrine on celibacy aligns perfectly with the practice of the Essenes who wrote the Dead Sea Scrolls, as Josephus testified,

 

They (the Essenes) don't have slaves or wives, because they think the first is unfair and the second just causes arguments.[7]

 

     A preference for celibacy existed both in the Bible and also in Christian tradition, as well as in the Gnostic literature.  In the Bible, Paul cautioned against marriage,[8] and John believed that virgins will receive heavenly rewards.[9]  Ancient Christian leaders encouraged celibacy as a way to draw closer to God.  Ignatius of Antioch, Justin Martyr, Athenagoras, Tertullian, Origen, Novation, Cyprian, Victorinus, and Pierius were among the pre-Constantine leaders who endorsed celibacy.  The only early Christian on record for expressing reservations about the practice of celibacy was Methodius.[10]  Yet it should be noted that Peter was married and Philip had children.[11]  As Jesus said, not everyone can accept the doctrine.  Even the angels of Christ are celibate, as Jesus says, "they neither marry nor are given in marriage," and everyone in the kingdom of God will eventually be celibate like the angels[12] – in this, they are unlike the world-creating angels of the demiurge, who amuse themselves with all manner of bestial perversion.

     Tertullian said that it was common for married Christian couples to abstain from sex by mutual consent, so that they could pursue a more spiritual union with God.[13]  Paul himself was apparently both married and celibate.  In one New Testament passage, he indicated that he was celibate, but also indicated that he had a "sister-wife."[14] 

     Recently, a new theory has become popular that Jesus and Mary Magdalene were married with children.  Yet this finds little support in early Christian literature.  We have, at our disposal for study, four dozen ancient Gnostic scriptures, a plethora of early Christian apocryphal books, and ten volumes of Christian literature written before Constantine.  Within this literature are detailed descriptions of the beliefs and practices of a multitude of unorthodox groups.  Yet none of these groups are said to have believed that Jesus and Mary Magdalene were lovers, nor that they had a child together.  No orthodox Christians believed it, and no "heretics" believed it either.  Nobody even suggested it.  This cavernous silence amidst a mountain of ancient literature makes the theory highly improbable. 

     Some point to The Gospel of Philip, which states that Jesus kissed Mary Magdalene.  Yet if Jesus kissed Magdalene, how is this different from what the New Testament states about fellowship – "Greet each other with a holy kiss?"[15]  Should we extrapolate from this that early Christian fellowship included orgies during church services?  Should we presume that Judas performed a homosexual act on Jesus when he "betrayed the Son of Man with a kiss?"[16]  Perhaps the elders of Ephesus were also homosexuals, for they kissed Paul on the neck.[17]  Likewise the merciful father who fell on the neck of his prodigal son and kissed him.[18]  Such misunderstanding is the result of an ethnocentric assumption that kissing is necessarily sexual.  Even to this day, a kiss is a greeting in Middle Eastern cultures, and does not carry with it any sexual connotation.  Why assume anything more concerning Mary Magdalene?

     Still, they point to the Merovingian kings of France as the ancestors of Christ and Magdalene.  Yet here, there was a political motivation for the invention of a lie, for the Merovingians were newly converted Germanic pagans struggling to control a nation of Latin Christians.  The ethno-religious struggle in France at that time was severe.  What better way for the Merovingian kings to legitimize their dynasty and unite their kingdom than to say they were descendents of the King of Kings himself?  Hence, the story was a political lie told for the unity of France – and even then it did not come about until 500 years after the fact.   

          Jesus was celibate, the Essenes were celibate, and many early Christians were celibate.  These facts are attested for in the earliest sources.  A sexual relationship between Jesus and Magdalene is not.

This section:  Genesis 1 is a forgery.

The creationist narrative in Genesis 1 is contradicted by many ancient Christian texts.  Instead of an Almighty Creator God, ancient Christian texts espouse that the universe is born from blind arrogance and stupidity.  The angels caused evolution to occur from species to species.  There are many gods, (or aliens?), and the Christian God is just one among them.  Satan the Devil writes scripture, and thus the Bible was polluted with Genesis 1.  Archaeology and modern scholarship demonstrate that Genesis is indeed corrupted.  Cavemen walk with Adam and Eve.  Esoteric prophecies reveal the coming of Christ, and also reveal the dark forces that govern the cosmos.  Such are the ancient Christian writings.

Science vindicates the truth of these ideas.  Evolution often happens too fast for Darwin’s theory.  Gaps in the fossil record indicate that some kind of unnatural force acts together with natural selection.  Astrobiology reveals that intelligent life probably evolved long before us.  The fossil record reveals strange clues that aliens abducted species and transported them across oceans, and that DNA from diverse lineages was combined to spawn hybrid species.  Evidently, aliens influence evolution, and they are the gods of the world’s religions. 

This is not fiction.  All these facts are thoroughly documented in the links above.

---